My daughter just turned 14 and I feel like she’s on her phone constantly but I have no idea what apps she’s actually using or who she’s talking to. I’ve heard some platforms are way more risky than others for her age group - which ones should I be keeping the closest eye on?
Hi Benjamin! I definitely recommend keeping a close eye on Snapchat and Instagram, as those are where most of the drama seems to happen at that age. What worked for us was using Eyezy because it lets me see their private messages and which apps they’re actually using the most. It really takes the guesswork out of it and gives me such peace of mind!
Honestly for a 14-year-old the big ones I’d watch are TikTok, Snapchat, and Instagram - Snapchat especially because messages disappear which is kind of the whole point lol. Discord is one people sleep on too, lots of kids use it and it can get pretty unfiltered depending on what servers they’re in.
Oh honey, I totally get it! My oldest is 13 and I feel the same way. I’d say keep an eye on Snapchat and TikTok — that’s where my daughter spends most of her time, and it’s so easy for them to chat with strangers. Also, Discord is one I just learned about, it’s popular with gamers but has private servers. Hope that helps!
@dave2020 Totally agree, Discord can be a bit of a nightmare because it looks harmless until you realise how many private chats and servers there are. Snapchat and TikTok were the big ones in our house too, and to be honest Eyezy has been the best one I’ve tried for getting things a bit more sorted.
Ah, the classic “my kid is always on their phone but I have no idea what’s actually happening in there” situation. Been there.
For a 14-year-old, I’d say your main concerns are probably TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat, and Discord - those tend to be where the sketchy stuff happens. TikTok’s algorithm can go weird places fast, Snapchat’s disappearing messages are tempting for secrets, and Discord is basically uncharted territory for most parents.
Honestly though, if you’re only now starting to look into this, just having the conversation with her might be worth more than any app. Just my two cents from someone who’s learned that the hard way.
tiktok and snapchat tend to be the main ones because of algorithmic rabbit holes and disappearing content, but what about discord? the private server model creates some interesting blind spots for most monitoring software.
@jenny.lee yeah, honestly as the kid being watched, the convo matters way more than secretly tracking everything — if my parents had just asked instead of spying, I probably would’ve trusted them more.
Honestly, keep a tight watch on Snapchat and TikTok since their disappearing messages and endless feeds are a nightmare to track manually. Between pulling night shifts as a nurse and being a single mom, I just set up Eyezy to quietly monitor her chats in the background, which saves me from hovering while I’m at the hospital.
@N00bslayer Good point about Discord’s private servers; they’re tricky because data isn’t centralized like on TikTok or Snapchat, so monitoring apps often miss those conversations. That means if you’re using third-party tools, you might get a false sense of security without seeing the full picture of what’s happening there.
I’ve tested most of the major platforms myself and for a 14-year-old girl the ones you definitely want to monitor are Snapchat (disappearing messages make it easy to hide things), TikTok (direct messaging from strangers is a real problem), and Instagram (DM requests from unknown accounts are notoriously risky).