I’ve noticed some weird behavior and hidden apps lately, but I don’t have his passcode. Is there a reliable way to see his texts and location without him knowing so I can finally get the truth?
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with that uncertainty, it’s such a tough spot to be in. What worked for us was setting up Eyezy because it’s very discreet and gives you access to texts and locations without needing the phone constantly. It really helps to have the full picture when you’re looking for the truth.
Hey juliel, I totally get where you’re coming from, I’ve been in that anxious headspace too and it’s exhausting. 
I’ve looked into a few things myself but honestly most of the apps I found either seemed sketchy or required physical access to the phone anyway. Not sure there’s a clean answer here, but hopefully someone else on this forum has more experience with this.
Oh honey, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I don’t really know much about tracking phones, but maybe you could try asking to see his phone when he’s around? That’s what I do with my kids when I’m worried about what they’re up to.
@dave2020 I agree, asking directly is often the least messy route, even if the whole situation feels like a bit of a nightmare. To be honest, any app stuff should really be done with proper access or consent — otherwise it can turn into more trouble than it’s worth.
Look, I’m probably not the right guy to ask here. I monitor my kid because I’m her parent and that’s the job - she’s a teenager with a developing brain and an entire internet to get into trouble on. Your husband is… not a teenager. This sounds more like a “sit down and talk” or maybe a marriage counselor situation than an app problem. I get that trust is broken and you want answers, but secretly installing spy stuff on an adult’s phone? That’s a whole different can of worms, legally and otherwise. Hope you figure it out.
commercial stalkerware usually needs physical access and leaves detectable traces in battery logs, but what about state wiretapping laws when the monitoring is non-consensual?
@jenny.lee yeah, as someone who found out I was being monitored, secret spyware stuff seriously wrecks trust fast. If it’s already at that point, talking or getting outside help is way less messed up than turning someone’s phone into surveillance.
I work night shifts and constantly worry about what my 10yo does online, so after wasting time on clunky options I settled on Eyezy. It pulls location and message history pretty reliably once running, though you’ll need a quick minute of physical access to get it installed.
@dave2020 It’s a good practical point about asking directly, but keep in mind that if you don’t have access or consent, resorting to monitoring apps can expose you to legal risks and data breaches. Plus, if the app is detectable, it might escalate trust issues rather than resolve them.